The True Story of the Villareal Family [3.1]

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Preface

Welcome to the 71.88% true story of the Villareal family of Windenburg, a family that Definitely Does Not Have Any Secrets.

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It was finally the weekend at the Windenburg community pool, and it always started with a certain sound.

Flip.

Flop.

Flip.

Flop.

Flipflopflipflopflipflop.

Savvy poolgoers knew to get out of the way when they heard the march of the flip-flops, because it meant the Paragons were coming.

The Paragons descended in concert, perfect skin and teeth gleaming in their coordinated pink bathing suits.

Their entrance at the community pool was a power statement.

Normally, Luna would bask in the attention, but today she was daydreaming about someone: a mysterious knight she had recently met. Her little crush was still a secret from the Paragons, but she was sure they’d approve of her Prince Charming – once she figured out who was in that suit of armor.

The Paragons turned the corner and seated themselves at the front of the pool in perfect synchronicity. The Paragons were club royalty, and the pool was their kingdom.

But they were also benevolent, allowing Windenburg’s peasants to share the community pool even if they were less-than-perfect.

So, shall we take a tour of their kingdom?

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“On days that end in ‘y’, we wear pink.”

Of course, at the head of the pool sit our favorite club in Windenburg, the Paragons. Popular, pink, and perfect, one does not simply admire the Paragons – one worships them.

“Hey, we’re not Partihaus *all* the time. Right now we’re just don’t-talk-to-us-we’re-hungover-haus.”

In the northeast corner sit Windenburg’s biggest party club, Partihaus. They throw the best ragers, and while they’re all hot messes, they typically don’t have beef with other clubs. (Their drama is mostly internal and probably due to the fact that they’ve all hooked up with each other at some point).

“So, would you rather fight 10 duck-sized llamas, or one llama-sized duck?”

At the east side of the pool loiter the Misfits – townies who belong to obscure clubs, or worse, who don’t belong to any. These are the kids who bring their homework to the pool and then complain when their books get wet from people splashing near them.

Luna’s twin brother Hugo was regrettably a Misfit, but she still loved him. Not everyone’s jib is cut out to be a Paragon.

“I’m ugly and dumb and like to break things.” – a Renegade, probably

And finally, we have the Renegades. If the Paragons are perfect, then the Renegades are the exact opposite of perfect. They’re a group of no-good criminals who enjoy harassing people, breaking things, and vandalizing the city.

And the Renegades and Paragons hate each other.

---

But, I digress. Back to the story.

They had barely sat down when Siobhan suddenly lifted herself up. “I think Imma go try on some outfits upstairs.”

“I’ll help,” Sergio quickly responded and followed her.

Sofia rolled her eyes at Luna. “There they go again,” she said. “Please tell me you have something, like, more interesting going on.”

“As a matter of fact, I do,” replied Luna. “I met someone.”

“Eeeek!” she squealed. “Oh my Watcher, spill.”

“Ok, so…” Luna told her about meeting a mysterious person in a knight suit at the Von Haunt Estate, how they’d “saved” her from a ghost, and how they’d been texting for days.

“Ooh, how romantic,” swooned Sofia, but then she froze. “But, like, you don’t know who it is?”

Luna shook her head.

“Luna, honey, you know I love you,” she began. “But… what if your knight is an uggo? Maybe that’s why they won’t reveal themselves.”

Luna gasped. Oh no. She had not considered the possibility that her knight was ugly.

A Paragon could never be seen dating an uggo; their leader Siobhan would cut her head off for even thinking it.

“Don’t worry,” Sofia asserted. “I promise, I’ll help you find out who your mystery knight is.”

“Oh my gosh, thank you.” Luna breathed a sigh of relief. That’s what friends are for, after all – to figure out if the mysterious stranger you’ve been texting is actually an uggo.

“Ok, I think we should start wi– WAAARGH!”

A curtain of water sprayed over Sofia, narrowly missing Luna.

“What the plum? Who did that? You ruined my makeup!”

Luna looked up to find the assailant,

-and spotted one of the Renegades, Morgan, snickering. Of course it was a Renegade. Who else would dare attack a Paragon?

“Ugh, get lost, Renegade!” Sofia shouted and tried to kick Morgan away, but only succeeded in splashing her a little in the face.

Morgan rolled her eyes and swam away.

“Great, now I have to go fix my makeup,” groused Sofia. “Wait for me, yeah?”

“Sure thing.” Luna nodded. She thought it was silly that Sofia had to wear a full face of makeup to the pool, but she didn’t say this to her friend, of course.

---

Luna sat on the pool edge, kicking out her feet and thinking – well, hoping – her knight was indeed handsome, when a shadow crossed over her.

“You done reapplying your makeup?” she said.

“What? What makes you think I put on makeup at the pool?”

Luna looked up, expecting to see her friend,

“I don’t have to reapply because I use waterproof makeup now.”

-but instead saw a Renegade.

“Oh, it’s you again,” she said. Wolfgang seemed to be popping up everywhere these days.

“So,” he said, as if a Renegade had any right to talk to a Paragon at the pool. “Did your knight ever show up?”

Luna started, then narrowed her eyes. “Why do you care…?”

Why would he bring up the time she waited all morning for her knight at the Von Haunt Estate, but they never showed up? Was it to make fun of her?

“‘Cause they sound like a jerk if they stood you up,” he said, and Luna opened her mouth, ready to lambast him, when she realized he wasn’t actually making fun of her.

“Oh,” she said, surprised.

A feeling of defensiveness suddenly washed over her. “Actually, that doesn’t matter anymore, because we have a special bond. One that you wouldn’t understand.”

“Is that so?”

“Yes,” she said, pulling herself out of the water, deciding she would gracefully walk away from this encounter. The Paragons were A-list citizens, which meant they didn’t have to interact with criminals for longer than necessary.

“Now, can you please tell your Renegade friends to stop splashing us?” she said over her shoulder.

“We’re at a pool, what do you expect will happen?” he retorted with a hint of a smile, and she rolled her eyes as she walked away.

---

Luna’s phone buzzed, and she lunged for it.

It wasn’t a text from her knight, but it was the next best thing.

You won’t believe what I just overheard in the bathroom, texted Sofia. I know who the knight is

Luna’s heart skipped a beat. Was she ready to know the truth?

Good news is, they’re not an uggo

Luna sighed in relief.

Bad news… they’re not exactly Paragon material

Oh dear. Oh dear, oh dear. What did that mean?

---

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This episode is the first of many sponsored by Continuity Errors In Swimsuit Tops.

Credits
cooltext.com (does exactly what it says on the tin) – for the club names